Who are you, exactly?

Wait, you sell a booklet about ganseys but will you teach me how to knit one?

Yes, she takes commissions. Full ganseys, custom sizes — she's also qualified as a technical editor, and can reverse-engineer patterns from actual knitted garments. She knows her way around a gansey. And yes, she's actually knit dozens of them, not just written about them.

There's a waiting list obviously. Quality takes time. And I personally vet every enquiry to make sure they understand she's not running a factory, she's a human with a finite number of hours before she collapses and needs tea. Drop her a line from the contacts page.

~ Wrinkle, Gatekeeper Extraordinaire

Are those gansey patterns actually any good?

Obviously yes, but since you're asking anyway:

The mini-gansey patterns (£5.99 each, or grab all three for £9.99) are genuine ganseys, not "samplers," not "practice pieces." They have the full architecture: seamless construction, underarm gussets, definition ridges, shoulder saddles, picked-up sleeves. Using 4ply and roughly 25g of yarn. Perfect for using up that lonely ball hiding at the bottom of your stash.

The All About Ganseys booklet (£9.99) is fifteen pages of Audrey actually questioning things instead of repeating myths. She talks about the competing origin theories (Guernsey? Silk imports? North Sea fleets?), examines the superstitions (no, initials didn't primarily identify drowned fishermen — that's a dramatic story, not history), and names her sources. If you appreciate evidence over folklore, this is your jam.

~ Wrinkle, Quality Control

Can I commission Audrey to knit me a gansey?

I'm Wrinkle, Eighteen centimetres of sassy crochet perfection, with wild purple hair (because green thistles are boring), a knitted grey scarf, and approximately 47 years' worth of judgement stored in these googly eyes. I have my own blog post. You should read it.

Audrey says I'm her "mascot". I prefer co-founder with better hair." And let's be honest. I'm the one who does the real work around here.

~ Wrinkled, Professional Diva

Here's the thing: Audrey knits commissioned ganseys from her home office. Yes, the office is cold. Yes, there's a thistle judging her needle choices. But here's the real answer:

Teaching someone to design and knit a full gansey properly takes time. Serious time. She's building courses and workshops for that, and they're going to be comprehensive. You can't rush heritage craft, and she's not going to dump half-formed PDFs on the internet just to say she's selling something.

The mini-patterns exist because a full gansey is a six-month commitment in fine yarn on 2.25mm needles. A mini is a weekend project. Learn the construction, prove you like it, then invest the hundreds of hours into a full garment. That's the sensible path.

~ Wrinkle, Logical Voice of Reason (rare appearance)

Do I HAVE to join your newsletter?

No, technically not. But here's what you'd miss:

• Early access to new pattern drops (you get a head start before the rest of the world)

• Discount codes on new products and services

• Actual progress updates that aren't algorithm-filtered into oblivion

• Behind-the-scenes stuff that doesn't fit on Instagram or Threads

• Occasionally, me being dragged into content against my will

So yes, sign up. Other sensible people have already done it. Don't be stubborn.

SIGN UP BEFORE I CHANGE YOUR MIND.

~ Wrinkle, Gentle Manipulation

What are The Gansey Diaries

Audrey wrote her first blog post instead of posting on Instagram because apparently social media is "too fast, too instant, too throw-away." We're both guilty of checking it constantly anyway, but the principle stands.

The Diaries document the creation of a new gansey alongside life, the universe, and British weather complaints. There's history, there's behind-the-scenes mess, there's occasional philosophical tangents about fishing communities and herring girls and why women deserve to be remembered for their work.

It's long-form. It's searchable. It doesn't disappear in 24 hours. Read it while I supervise from my perch.

READ THE FIRST POST

~ Wrinkle, Content Curator

Where do I buy stuff?

Patterns and booklets are on Payhip. Click the link, pick your poison, checkout happens securely. Download arrives instantly. No physical postage because we're all trying to reduce carbon footprints.

Commissioned ganseys don't work like that. Those require actual conversation, measurements, and possibly me auditing your enthusiasm level. Use the contact form, be patient, and maybe send flowers. Metaphorical flowers.

~ Wrinkle, Customer Service Representative

Still got questions?

Emailing Audrey is faster than waiting for me to check my inbox. Though if you write something particularly witty, I might remember it forever.

GET IN TOUCH